Hosea

So, the truth is, I'm nothing without the truth of God's Word.

I love the convenience of the YouVersion app on my Kindle.  They have a wide variety of Bible reading plans.  I spent the last three months reading "Psalms and Proverbs in 31 Days" (yeah, yeah, took me a little longer!!), and it was SO encouraging and equipping and challenging.  I was sad to come to the end of the reading plan and wondered what God had for me next.  I browsed the other reading plans and decided (mostly randomly) on "SheReadsTruth: HOSEA".  I figured I should read something that I haven't spent a lot of time in before and it seemed interesting.
Then I read today's.......and I just have to share it with you!  I know it is kind of alot of reading, but I encourage you to hang in here and see what God might have for you in His awesome Word!!  (Just to be clear, the devotional part after the Bible passages are from SheReadsTruth, not from me!)

Hosea 4

1Hear the word of the Lord, O people of Israel!

The Lord has brought charges against you, saying:

“There is no faithfulness, no kindness,

no knowledge of God in your land.

2You make vows and break them;

you kill and steal and commit adultery.

There is violence everywhere—

one murder after another.

3That is why your land is in mourning,

and everyone is wasting away.

Even the wild animals, the birds of the sky,

and the fish of the sea are disappearing.

4“Don’t point your finger at someone else

and try to pass the blame!

My complaint, you priests,

is with you.

5So you will stumble in broad daylight,

and your false prophets will fall with you in the night.

And I will destroy Israel, your mother.

6My people are being destroyed

because they don’t know me.

Since you priests refuse to know me,

I refuse to recognize you as my priests.

Since you have forgotten the laws of your God,

I will forget to bless your children.

7The more priests there are,

the more they sin against me.

They have exchanged the glory of God

for the shame of idols.

8“When the people bring their sin offerings, the priests get fed.

So the priests are glad when the people sin!

9‘And what the priests do, the people also do.’

So now I will punish both priests and people

for their wicked deeds.

10They will eat and still be hungry.

They will play the prostitute and gain nothing from it,

for they have deserted the Lord

11to worship other gods.

“Wine has robbed my people

of their understanding.

12They ask a piece of wood for advice!

They think a stick can tell them the future!

Longing after idols

has made them foolish.

They have played the prostitute,

serving other gods and deserting their God.

13They offer sacrifices to idols on the mountaintops.

They go up into the hills to burn incense

in the pleasant shade of oaks, poplars, and terebinth trees.

“That is why your daughters turn to prostitution,

and your daughters-in-law commit adultery.

14But why should I punish them

for their prostitution and adultery?

For your men are doing the same thing,

sinning with whores and shrine prostitutes.

O foolish people! You refuse to understand,

so you will be destroyed.

15“Though you, Israel, are a prostitute,

may Judah avoid such guilt.

Do not join the false worship at Gilgal or Beth-aven,

even though they take oaths there in the Lord’s name.

16Israel is stubborn,

like a stubborn heifer.

So should the Lord feed her

like a lamb in a lush pasture?

17Leave Israel alone,

because she is married to idolatry.

18When the rulers of Israel finish their drinking,

off they go to find some prostitutes.

They love shame more than honor.

19So a mighty wind will sweep them away.

Their sacrifices to idols will bring them shame.

Romans 3:9-27

9Well then, should we conclude that we Jews are better than others? No, not at all, for we have already shown that all people, whether Jews or Gentiles, are under the power of sin. 

10As the Scriptures say,

“No one is righteous—

not even one.

11No one is truly wise;

no one is seeking God.

12All have turned away;

all have become useless.

No one does good,

not a single one.”

13“Their talk is foul, like the stench from an open grave.

Their tongues are filled with lies.”

“Snake venom drips from their lips.”

14“Their mouths are full of cursing and bitterness.”

15“They rush to commit murder.

16Destruction and misery always follow them.

17They don’t know where to find peace.”

18“They have no fear of God at all.”

19Obviously, the law applies to those to whom it was given, for its purpose is to keep people from having excuses, and to show that the entire world is guilty before God. 

20For no one can ever be made right with God by doing what the law commands. The law simply shows us how sinful we are.

21But now God has shown us a way to be made right with him without keeping the requirements of the law, as was promised in the writings of Moses and the prophets long ago. 

22We are made right with God by placing our faith in Jesus Christ. And this is true for everyone who believes, no matter who we are.

23For everyone has sinned; we all fall short of God’s glorious standard. 

24Yet God, with undeserved kindness, declares that we are righteous. He did this through Christ Jesus when he freed us from the penalty for our sins. 

25For God presented Jesus as the sacrifice for sin. People are made right with God when they believe that Jesus sacrificed his life, shedding his blood. This sacrifice shows that God was being fair when he held back and did not punish those who sinned in times past, 

26for he was looking ahead and including them in what he would do in this present time. God did this to demonstrate his righteousness, for he himself is fair and just, and he declares sinners to be right in his sight when they believe in Jesus.

27Can we boast, then, that we have done anything to be accepted by God? No, because our acquittal is not based on obeying the law. It is based on faith. 

28So we are made right with God through faith and not by obeying the law.

29After all, is God the God of the Jews only? Isn’t he also the God of the Gentiles? Of course he is. 

30There is only one God, and he makes people right with himself only by faith, whether they are Jews or Gentiles. 

31Well then, if we emphasize faith, does this mean that we can forget about the law? Of course not! In fact, only when we have faith do we truly fulfill the law. 

"As I read Hosea 4, my lips and heart grow silent. The image of Israel’s spiritual adultery is sobering to say the least. Part of me recoils at the dark and difficult language of Hosea, and yet how much more painful must it be for the God of heaven - creator, sustainer and lover of Israel - to watch His people choose path after path of destruction? His bride and His children quite literally running away?
The Father grieves as Israel gives their hearts to that which destroys them. He grieves as they run. He would be just to punish their sin in full, to give up and walk away. And yet He pursues them still.
He pursues us still.


The chasm of sin grows wider and we run faster, but our God changes not.

He is still sovereign, even as we flee.
God does not force Israel to stay, for forcing is not the way of Love. In fact, Hosea 4 paints the tragic picture of what it would look like for the Lord to end His pursuit of Israel, for Him to leave them to the sin that would surely destroy them. “Ephraim is joined to idols,” says verse 17. “Leave him alone.” (ESV)

Sisters, let us praise God today that He does not walk away when we run.
We are sinful. He is steadfast.
We are fearful. He is faithful.
We are broken. He binds up.
We cherish idols. He cherishes us.

His love and affection toward us do not change, no matter the depth of our sin.

Let us repent and rejoice in light of this truth today. Let us thank Him for allowing us to turn and to return to Him."


See what I mean?  I just couldn't NOT share it with you......

How I Got Here

For the past week or so, I've been thinking about a rough time I had a few years back.  I think confession is good for the soul, and honestly, this period of time has been knocking around in my head for a while, so I'm thinking it is time I share about it.  I'm praying that I don't sound too whiny and that you see this as what it is: a time in my life that I've learned from and I hope you can too.

It wasn't all that long ago.  My first two babies were little, and I was overwhelmed.  They are only 16 months apart, so everything felt crazy and new and like I wasn't doing anything right.  I was tired.  I was also faced with a lot of emotions that I couldn't really recognize and didn't really know how to process.

I am a surprise stay at home mom.  When I was pregnant with our first baby, I was a full time teacher, and we assumed I would go back to work a few months after she was born.  And then I got really super sick, and God intervened in a HUGE way and, suffice it to say, I am a stay at home mom.  (Ok, that was a VERY abbreviated version of that story.....I might share more about that topic in another post, but right now, those are the details you need to know!)  

And I didn't know how hard it was going to be. 

 I didn't realize that I would be the one grocery shopping, so I could essentially buy whatever the heck I wanted to indulge on (in the SUV on the way home from the store, sometimes), and I didn't realize I could eat up a ton of stuff and no one would really know.  

I didn't realize how much I would miss working, and I didn't realize how much guilt I carried for having those feelings.  I didn't know how a person could be so grateful (to be alive, to be a mom, to be at home) and so lonely at the same time. I didn't know how much I would miss my co-workers.

I didn't realize how good hot, buttered white bread toast would taste when my kitchen was a mess and my baby wouldn't nurse well.    

I didn't realize that the perfect farmhouse on 15 acres would feel like a jail some days.

I didn't know that having two babies who clung on me all the time would make me really yearn for company....from grown ups, who didn't spit up, and who wiped their own nether regions.

I didn't realize that Snickers really DO satisfy.....in a really awful, unfulfilling, short-term sort of way.  

There were a lot of new things in my life then.....lots of transition and figuring things out.  There was a lot of failure and tears.  And the only way I dealt with it was FOOD.

Food was my friend when I needed someone to talk to.

Food was the peace and quiet when everyone was crying for me.

Food was the steady in my new world.

Food was entertaining when laundry and dishes were boring.

Food tasted good.

Food was also my enemy.  My kids were allergic to almost everything then, and I had to be so nit-picky careful about what they ate and who got what plates and who had the rice milk and how to plan a menu when everyone (but me) was allergic to all these random things.  I was constantly having to think about food, as part of my "job" of mothering.  I couldn't ignore it....they needed me to be on top of it.  But thinking about there food led me to thinking about my food.....mmm, what would I eat next?!

And I indulged and ate and pacified myself with whatever I could find.


It has taken me a few years to even see how sad and lonely I was then.  When my husband's new job moved us to a new state, I made some changes....I sought fellowship, I latched onto the people around me, and I was getting the hang of motherhood (although, who EVER gets the hang of it fully?!).
But I still gravitated toward food....when my husband had a business trip, when the kids were extra whiny, when I was bored, when I was pregnant again (I mean, the baby's gotta eat, right??).

So, I ate, and I got fat.  I never looked at a scale, because "People should love me for me!" But this weight on me is my fault.  I'm not fat because I've had four kids.  It isn't their fault, and I never EVER want them to think that I, in some way, blame them for the way I look.  Yes, our bodies change when we are pregnant and they are never quite the same after.  That is part of being a mom.  The WEIGHT....that is MINE, not theirs.  They did not force me to handle my problems with food.  I did.

Even if everything had been perfect, I still would have sought out food.

I did this to myself, and I have to make the changes to remedy the situation.   If I don't accept that this is MY deal, then how can I actually make a change?  I mean, if it were my parents' fault or if my husband should shoulder some of the blame, then how can I make the change?  My progress would be reliant on someone else fixing something.  As it is, no one can do that.  I have to.

And I have.  I have spent time confessing my sins to God.  I've been honest with myself (finally) and confessed to my strong, perfect, understanding Heavenly Father that even though He's always been there--on my most overwhelming days....on my lonely days....on the failure days--I've turned away from Him and looked to food to fill the emptiness.  This process means that I'm repenting often and having lots of "trench" moments....lots of prayers from the pantry, asking God to help me to say no to myself.  This process has been so much more spiritual than I ever would have thought.  Who knew making better food choices and trying to exercise more would actually draw me close to God and make me examine my heart?

On the other side of confession, I have found that God really does love us in whatever state we are in.  He's shown me SO MUCH over the past few months.  And that is really what I'm doing here....telling what God has done.  So, I wanted you to know where I've come from, so you can see what He's doing in where I am now.  

16Come and listen, all you who fear God,

and I will tell you what he did for me.

17For I cried out to him for help,

praising him as I spoke.

18If I had not confessed the sin in my heart,

the Lord would not have listened.

19But God did listen!

He paid attention to my prayer.

20Praise God, who did not ignore my prayer

or withdraw his unfailing love from me.

                                                 Psalm 66

It's Only Fair

Really, you have to know that I am NOT doing this alone.  There is just no way that I could lose weight without some help.  So I'm going to give credit where credit is due.  I am NOT a paid spokesperson (but, boy, wouldn't that be nice!) and I'm not out to publicly endorse or defame weight loss companies or authors.  But here is what is working for me:

Weight Watchers.....I'm a point-counting, meeting attender who needs the structure and accountability of a program like WW.  Some people do Atkins or paleo or SouthBeach.  I don't know a thing about those.  I tried WW and it worked (when I do my part), so I'm sticking with it.  My secret goal is to be one of those "lifer" weigh-in ladies OR to get my own commercial with Jennifer Hudson.  We could do a duet....www.weightwatchers.com

"Made To Crave" by Lysa TerKeurst .....It has been a wonderful, encouraging, convicting, Biblically true book that has been challenging my heart and mind.  She makes me cry on a regular basis, because she often says what is deep in my heart....or on the tip of my tongue! www.madetocrave.org

My "Friends"......Every week, after weigh-in, I post my progress on Facebook.   Some people think I'm nuts, others probably skim right by that update in their news feed, but those who comment and/or "like" have built me up, encouraged me, and been a source of accountability.  Oh, and heck NO, I don't put my weight on FB!  I just put how much I've lost (or gained, as has been the case more times than I care to admit).

My Husband......who is a life-long athlete, a Division I All American athlete in college who went on a full athletic scholarship, who runs marathons, has completed an Ironman, and just generally looks good in EVERY dern piece of clothing he owns!  It can be frustrating to feel like the ugly duckling, the wife of Jack Sprat, etc...but the truth is, he loves me--not "skinny me" or "chubby me", just me.  On my yucky days, he loves me, and on my "skinny jeans and knee boots" days, he loves me.  He understands that this is important to me, and he carefully encourages me (because what husband is dumb enough to get too gung-ho about your wife going to WW!?).   He also deals with my hungry and crabby mood swings.

So, there you have it.

I'm not alone.

Traveling "Light"

I'm on a journey.  It is a journey I've been on longer than I originally thought.  Yes, there was a day when I was sick of myself, sick of putting one more pair of jeans on the pile in my closet for clothes that had become too small.  Yes, there was a day I signed up for WW and sheepishly stood on the scale while a stranger wrote down my weight.  I wanted to cry.  I did cry, in the van, on the way home.  But that wasn't the beginning of this journey.  The journey started years before.  I don't actually know when it started, or where.  I don't know what triggered me to turn to food when I was sad and lonely, angry or stressed.  But I did.  And whenever this journey started, God knew that He was going to use it to draw me in, that He wouldn't leave me ill-equipped.  I thought I was shamefully and embarrassingly bad, but He has other things for me.

So, I'm going to write about it.   Along the way, I have been blessed to see I'm not alone in this journey.  There is a beautiful and bountiful number of people who know where I am, know where I've been, because they are there too.

These will be travel logs on my journey to something new.  I hope this is encouraging and that you recognize yourself in my thoughts.  But not only that.... I hope you see a God Who loves you fully and Who won't waste anything in our lives.  I hope you see Him as the Source of all the good stuff you read here, and I pray He receives all the glory and honor from wherever this journey leads.